trying to ditch the consumer mentality

actionreplay

I am finding this hard, almost like I need a 12-step program.

This addiction to stuff, stuff, more stuff. I think to myself, "why exactly am I walking round the shops aimlessly?" It's because I want to find the answer to life, the univerise and everything outside myself, like administering a drug or a medication.

But like any addiction (I'm a dry alcoholic, have been for 10 years, was a non-dry one before then) it doesn't solve the problem. It's the habit of a lifetime.

I am having quite a bit of success with this, but so far still to go... any tips/advice folks? I ask myself every time I feel tempted to buy something, "is there a real reason I am tempted to buy this, or is it a way of displacing my dissatisfaction, stress, fears or other negative emotion into acquisition?" Works most of the time, not always... I am learning to stay AWAY from malls (difficult, as my workplace entrance is in a mall., walk past all the shops every day on the way to the train..).

turmoil

Step 1

- Cut up your credit cards and only bring enough money with you to get you home plus water or something to eat. Pretend it's the only money you'll ever have again.
_________________
"If you are a real seeker after truth, it's necessary that at least once in your life you doubt all things as far as possible"-Rene Descartes

"When you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains however improbable must be the truth"-Sherlock Holmes

actionreplay

actually I do not own any personal credit cards Smile

I have a company one for official business only. I use a debit card for on-line purchases....

The only bring as much money as you need to buy lunch and get home one is a good idea though. Will try leaving my ATM card at home....

turmoil

May the anti-consumer force be with you Smile

_________________
"If you are a real seeker after truth, it's necessary that at least once in your life you doubt all things as far as possible"-Rene Descartes

"When you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains however improbable must be the truth"-Sherlock Holmes

lotrfan55345

Just go to Picadilly Square, SoHo and Canary Wharf. I'm sure you will be cured after your experience.

NeoPeasant

1. Read the book "Affluenza"

2. Every time you go to buy something, look at it and think whether you would go without dinner to pay for it if you had to.

3. Think of how your home is being smothered by all the crap you bought.

4. Think of how much of you life is wasted being the custodian and guardian of your crap.

5. Go home, look at all your crap and think of how you would right now much rather have the money back you spent to buy it all.

6.Imagine yourself living simply and working half as many hours per week as you do now, or retiring 10 years earlier than you had planned.

Sencha

I detest consumerism, but I don't think the mentally should be ditched entirely. I say embrace it responsibly. We're the last ones in human history that will get to know the abundance and cheapness of goods. We might as well make it worth our while.

I personally, just don't buy much of anything. Just a few of the things I really want. I could care less about anything else. I don't deprive myself of what is really important to me, so I might be a consumerist. But I will almost never buy something that I couldn't put to practical use or is of specific interest to me. Its not that hard to do, just boil down everything you buy to the bare essentials and two or three interests.
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Vision without action is a dream, action without vision is a nightmare.

rogerhb

Ludi

I've been buying a lot more stuff lately because I'm afraid I won't be able to later, that it will be too expensive. So I've been buying a lot of tools and building supplies, spending rather a lot of money. Shocked

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SpaciousDreamer · Tar Sands Joined: Jul 07, 2005 Posts: 22

I only buy necessities and useful tools for the future, which I think of as an investment.

People consume because it makes them feel good–I think a study was done on women's brains during shopping sprees that showed the release of endorphins.

I stopped consuming, but now I replaced it by purchasing services, which is worth it b/c at least when you get a massage, you are supporting that person directly. I also spend $$$ on classes: survival weekends, self-defense, etc. Try it - a workout gives you a great sense of satisfaction.
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Pretty girls make graves.

actionreplay

stuipd_monkeys: thanks Smile

lotrfan55345: "Just go to Picadilly Square, SoHo and Canary Wharf. I'm sure you will be cured after your experience." actually I work in Canary Wharf (for one of those evil banks!).

NeoPeasant: Yes I've read "affluenza" and I recognised myself in it. Part of my
problem is that I have really bought into the idea that looking "nice" is very important for my self-esteem and that looking nice = "buying new things to enhance my appearance". I know the answer is to stop, think, and ask why I want to go
shopping. The "would you go without dinner for this" is a good one. I will remember this next time I feel tempted.

"magine yourself living simply and working half as many hours per week as you do now, or retiring 10 years earlier than you had planned." ah yes that would be... nice. mmmm all that free time. THe rat race is starting to get to me, all those 50-hour weeks... not including lunch (it's to pay off my mortgage, my choice,
I'm not being exploited).

Spacious Dreamer: yes I do work out a lot and you're right, it's the best "natural feelgood" thing out there. That and a good night's sleep...

TBH I know what to do, posted for encouragement to continue doing it (as in questionning the impulse to buy, buy buy).... thanks all!

Dingbat · Tar Sands Joined: Apr 11, 2005 Posts: 24

I read "Your Money or your Life" - a book about voluntary simplicity.

Changed my life. Aside from my mortgage (which I want to pay off as fast as humanly possible), I have no debt.

Everytime you want to buy something, just ask yourself these questions:

a) do I _really_ need this?
b) is the item worth the X number of hours you have to work to pay it?
c) could you get it used instead of brand new?

Silly little questions like that.

Cured me.

- Dingbat.

Auntie_Cipation · Heavy Crude Joined: Aug 18, 2005 Posts: 100

YMOYL changed my life too. Gave me a more solid perspective around which to focus my "Auntie Consumerism" Rolling Eyes

. I liked it so much I bought ten copies to give to various friends/family. (that was a major burst of consumerism, for me! Razz

). I recommend it to everyone. Even if you're already living pretty simply, the insights into attitudes and perspectives about money are well worth reading.

Postscript to YMOYL -- even though I didn't follow all the steps, in the past year I have made the following changes: quit a fulltime $60k-a-year job, spent a year doing home improvement projects which are about to come to fruition as my house is in escrow selling for 150% of what it would have sold for a year ago, now I've taken a 5-hour-a-week, $3000-a-year job, which I expect to meet nearly half my monetary needs into the indefinite future. As soon as I make one more credit card payment (money's in the bank, just waiting for the bill to arrive) I will be entirely debt free. And that's BEFORE the house sells. Very Happy

Back to Auntie Consumerism -- What works well for me is to develop a "striving" for minimalism, that is comparable to the "striving" a typical consumer might have for STUFF. So, when I'm tempted to buy some gadget, I balance my desire for that gadget with my desire to keep my personal belongings spartan. I often find that I want the simplicity even more than I want the thing, which makes it easy to resist acquiring more and more.
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"It's not that hard times are coming, it's that soft times are going."

Harpo Marx

seldom_seen · Fission Joined: Apr 12, 2005 Posts: 2038

"Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb-nail."

-- Thoreau

Doly · Expert Joined: Dec 03, 2004 Posts: 4040

I'm a natural Spartan, I guess. My mother used to despair because I never wanted to buy clothes (how many girls are like that?). My natural attitude towards buying anything has always been: "But, do I really need this?"

This doesn't stop me from being a window-shopper. I work in a mall, too, and I love having the chance to look at all those gorgeous things. But I seldom want to have them. Most of them I feel are pretty to look at, but totally useless in practice. So I feel they are much better there in the shop windows, where I can look at them but they use up no space in my home!