New relationships for a peaker mindset

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK

There's one thing I'm pretty sure about in the coming collapse, I do not wanna be single in that time. I want someone to fight for, some one to fight with, and someone to comfort, and comfort me.

After all, without any close family, children or a significant other, whats' the point in surviving? despite my very doomerish views, I do want a child one day, one that will be part of picking up the peaces for the next stage of humanity. I mean, that's what life is all about right? I know some of you have the view that having kids post peak is stupid/selfish, and I can understand that, even if I don't really agree. I just hope that within 10 years i'm in a somewhat stable situation (access to food and water) or i'll not be following this dream

Anyway, I've never really been single for any length of time, I was blessed with goodish looks (I'm guessing it's to compensate for my terrible grammar skills Razz

) so getting a girl is not exactly a problem for me. I broke up with my last gf a year ago because I've been commuting from the states to the UK every few month on work (this is set to continue for 2 years, at least, that's what they think).

So what now? well here is my problem. I don't think I could form a relationship based on trust and honesty (the only kind i'll do) without telling them about my plans for peak oil fairly soon into it. I mean, it affects everything I do and think about, especially now. Problem is, not many girls will stick around after they see you are a doomer (or crazy, in their eyes) wasting all this time and effort preparing for whats to come. I mean, I would hold off on talking about it for a while but a hardened doomer like me believes there is no time.

So I could just flat out lie to her, prepare for it for the two of us in secret, then once TSHTF she will no doubt be more open to hear what I have to say. But I still can't see it going down that way, I would have problems nodding in agreement as she tells me her five year plan for work and collage, ect.

Or, I could wait for the crash to kick in, and take my pick from all the women looking for someone to lead them to safety (natural section could be fun for the prepared after all), hell maybe I can get more then one at a time that way Smile

Seriously though, I really wish I had a partner already who would have known me long enough to forgive my 'crazy' ramblings. I fear I'll be fighting, and maybe dieing, alone, at a fairly young age.

Thanks for reading, needed to get this one off my chest.

MattSavinar · Elite Joined: May 09, 2004 Posts: 2000

Kevin of http://www.cyrptogon.com met his woman Becky at EHarmony.com

Now they live on a farm in NZ with goats:

http://farmlet.co.nz/?p=46

His ad was totally blunt "I'm moving off grid preparing for the collapse."

Obviously, YMMV.
_________________
http://www.peakoil.org

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK

I never even considered just coming out with it like that in a personal ad. What have I got to lose right?

Hmmm just need something catchy for the ad.

'Doomer seeks women for apocalyptic times. Must have GSOH and be able to wash cloths by hand.'

Maybe not...

benzoil

"Do the things you like to do and you'll eventually meet someone else who likes those things, too." This advice once prompted a friend of mine to quip that he'd spent 2 years smoking dope and watching cartoons in his basement and never met anyone.

Traditionally though, the best way to meet people is through participation in clubs or organizations/churches where you are likely to meet someone with a common interest or outlook. In this case, I'd look for Peak Oil meetups, sustainable living groups, stitch n' bitch groups (knitting/needlepoint), or similar.

Also traditionally, PO.com is probably not the best place to get advice on meeting chicks. I've been married over 13 years and even if I weren't my best hit line is probably, "Hey, baby, I'm a good provider." Still, maybe Matt got a good response from the Doomer chics with his movie appearance in front of those MRE boxes. Very Happy

Definitely untraditional, but just crazy enough to work...
_________________
TANSTAAFL

Grifter

I think being able to do well in a recession, by not having debt, having varied skills, being willing to do hard work and still managing to be cheerful will make you attractive to chicks.

I hope so anyway.

I like the woman in our local newsagents Rolling Eyes

wont be mentioning po anytime soon I can tell you.

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK

Haha for sure. BTW I'm not expecting to meet the love of my life here Razz

I'm actuality starting to think maybe I should just wait it out until TSHTF. That way, I can see what women are likely to cope. I should imagine there will be a pretty large amount of women that just can't take life without new shoes.

I'm also pretty tempted by what Matts suggested, be interesting to see how many women respond to an ad that bluntly states you are looking for someone to be with in the collapse. Who knows maybe there are more women peak aware then we thought.

How many ladies post here frequently? Women are less likely to use forums in my experience, even those that use the net often for everything else. I got a pm from a woman peaker here responding to a topic I started, because she didn't wanna get flamed off the board for her opinion, I guess this is a common reason for it.

virgincrude

What Went Wrong, you'll soon see how many male posters here are flaming arrogant macho right wing dip sticks, which is one reason women steer clear Very Happy

Having said that, you just never know when the love of your life will show up and when she does, neither she nor you will care that you see yourself as a Peak Oil Doomer. It's all part of that big luvvable package, after all. If you find her (and you will) you'll be amazed how well you fit together, despite how you perceive things right now. Take a wander round this site and the UK Powerswitch and you'll come across plenty of Peak oil aware women. I don't think they all look like Wolfowitz' girlfriend (I doubt if she's a 'peaker' anyway!)

Having found my perfect partner on the net five years ago, I recommend it, and I'd go with Matts advice: women really appreciate honesty.

I'm glad you're hoping to find someone to share the hard times ahead. After being in shock for a whole year (Post partum Depression is NOTHING on Post Peak awareness!) after learning about what's ahead, I am EXTREMELY glad I have my four-year-old daughter (and yes, Peak aware partner) to bravely go forward into the unknown.

And try to get a perspective: generally Europe will sink more slowly than the US where I WOULD NOT recommend you choose to settle with your partner......
Happy Hunting!

Shannymara

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK

snowshoegal · Tar Sands Joined: Oct 24, 2006 Posts: 99 Location: Canada

MattSavinar · Elite Joined: May 09, 2004 Posts: 2000

virgincrude

Shanny, I knew as I wrote that someone would have the opposite view, I was kinda being sarky (no, not Sarkozy, sarcastic) sorry to belittle post partum depression. But seriously, I was deeply screwed for a year after reading Heinberg and discovering all the associated webs. I don't want to even imagine being depressed post partum, post peak was enough for me...

And WWW, you're right, the UK is far more US-like in its suburban dorm-city life style, I also realised the questionability of my European statement after posting. However, nevertheless, notwithstanding etc., the UK population is far far more intelligent than the US population, which gives a smidgin of hope for when TSHTF.

Further to Matt's suggestion, you could just start by suggesting you're into 'alternative' life styles, i.e grow-your-own, off-grid, holistic etc etc. Kind of hint, rather than slap right upside the face?

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK

virgincrude

WWW wrote: Far far more intelligent? I wholeheartedly disagree. In fact I found many more people in the USA that were capable of intelligent conversation then I do in the UK, and these were people in your bog standard dive bars. The UK is overrun with chavs and football hooliganes. as well as the dived between the English, sottish and Welsh (that will only get worse post peak).

Okay, okay, you and I don't have the same understanding of intelligence Very Happy

I agree the UK is actually a horrid place, that's why I don't live there. But just review the differences in the MSM: where in the world can you find a substitute for the good ole BBC? British TV does more than entertain, it informs and sometimes educates, for this, like everything else of quality in the US, you have to pay.

As someone who hates pubs and your average "bog standard dive bars' I guess my assessment of the UK versus US average intelligence levels is not from your average Joe Blow. How many of those you engage with in 'intelligent conversations' know who is the current president of France, or who chairs the IMF and where he comes from? How many think Antonio Banderas is Latin American?

I have lived in various parts of Europe and spent three years in S.F; the depth of intelligence found in the former simply cannot be found in the latter, it has to do with genetics and upbringing. Intelligent conversation is not hard to find in the US, depth of intelligence is.

What_Went_Wrong · Heavy Crude Joined: May 08, 2007 Posts: 119 Location: UK